Saturday, January 26, 2013

Day 26 - Winter/Summer

If the question is, "Which one is better?" then the correct answer is "Summer." Winter sucks. Fuck winter.
Winter sucks because it's cold. You're cold when you get out of bed in the morning, you're cold before you get in the shower, you're cold after you get out of the shower, you're cold walking out to your car and waiting for it to warm up, you're basically just cold all freaking day, every day, week after week. I HATE BEING COLD. Fuck cold.
And snow. MOTHER FUCKING SNOW. Snow clings to the hems of your pants so when you come inside, it melts and soaks up your pant legs so you spend the rest of the day with cold, damp fabric clinging to your calves. AGAIN WITH THE COLD, FUCK COLD. Snow sucks because you have to shovel it off your car before you can get in. It sucks because your car tires can slip and skid on the freeway or at intersections. I fucking hate snow. Sledding, skiing, blah blah blah. I hate being outside anyway. The only thing worse than being somewhere I hate, is being somewhere I hate in something that I hate.
Oh, but snow is so pretty when it first falls! Yeah, snow is fucking pretty. THE FIRST TIME. The second, third, forth, and sixty-seventh times it falls, it's just fucking irritating. And it sure as hell doesn't stay pretty. It turns gray and crusty and gross and full of rocks. Fuck snow. What a bullshit form of precipitation.
Summer - sunshine, daisies, beaches, whatever whatever whatever. The best thing about summer is that it's not fucking winter. You don't have to put on fifty goddamn layers of clothes every time you go out. Because that's yet another thing that sucks about winter - putting on your hat and coat and scarf and gloves and snow pants and boots just so you don't FREEZE TO GODDAMN DEATH. And then taking them all off when you come home, and they're all drippy and wet and they smell kind of weird.

1 comment:

Emily said...

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why you move to California ...