Sunday, January 6, 2013

Day 6 - Embarrassment

Basically, everything embarrasses me.

- I'm embarrassed when I finish telling a story, and the person I'm telling to says, "Yeah, you told me that already." And often, "... three times."

- I'm embarrassed when I show up at the wrong house for a party. (I did this for the first time last month. It was mortifying.)

- I'm embarrassed when I misinterpret someone's question so badly that I end up revealing something extremely personal about myself, when they were asking something completely innocuous.

- I'm embarrassed when I'm talking to myself and I accidentally make eye contact with someone, and it looks like I'm chanting incantations at them.

- I'm embarrassed when I'm listening to Hedwig and the Angry Inch and someone who's unfamiliar with the show walks in on the line, "Where my penis used to be, where my vagina never was..."

- I'm embarrassed to reveal that the first cassette tape I ever owned was Michael Bolton's Soul Provider.

- I'm embarrassed that I didn't learn to ride a bike until I was almost 11.

- And after 17 years, I still get embarrassed when I think about The Valentine Incident.



I'm getting embarrassed just thinking about all these embarrassing things. I'm going to go drink myself to death now.


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

On almost a daily basis I think of the time when I was 14 and I went down a slide at lunchtime at school and there was a big muddy puddle at the bottom.

I got my bum muddy and had to do the rest of the day at school with a big brown bum. 16 years later I worry about slides, although it has been a long time since I went down one, and then of that day often.

It wasn't even all that bad - I hid it with a jumper round my waist but the embarrassment burned it into my mind.

Batmanda said...

Oh dear! Once when I was 17, I laughed so hard in acting class that I peed myself. I had a stain on the back of my skirt, so I took off my jacket and tied it around my waist for the rest of the day. I'd totally forgotten about that! You're not alone, random internet person!

Emily said...

At least the Michael Bolton tape was a gift, and not your own purchase.

I'm still embarrassed about the time I did a cartwheel at work and split my pants. Or the time I was dancing at Homecoming and split my pants. I need to find pants that fit.

Batmanda said...

To be fair, the homecoming pants were cheap $8 pants from Kohl's. Weren't they made of tinfoil or something?

Samantha Fromm Haddow said...

I still can't ride a bike...